I can’t believe it. Nine days ago, I was siting here thinking: Fuck this shit.

I was done. No one was ever gonna understand. Nothing was gonna help.

Four weeks into another adventure, more confused than when I started.

I didn’t know it yet, but I had to kill some sacred cows. Let some shit go.

I hit the wall on Tuesday. Made a decision not to give up on Wednesday.

Woke-up Thursday with a fierce determination to get specific answers.

I went to the one person that wouldn’t be intimated by my examination.

She gave me what I needed to know. I started all over. Another reset.

Friday was an awakening. I woke up with an undeniable sense of clarity.

It was in the hierarchy. A new way of looking at things. A paradigm shift.

I was having a new and different experience with anxiety. I was changing.

What about those sacred cows? CBT? Behaviorism? Fucking 12-Steps?

The casualties of war. Not everything, not everyone, should be saved.

I worried for days that something broke in my brain. Something did.

Constant connections. Making new connections. Re-wiring old ones.

Rushes of emotion. Wanting to cry. Confidence simply from sitting with it.

To be continued…